I wanted to talk a little bit about nursing an older baby. The last time I wrote on the subject Eleanor was four months old, which was half of her life ago, and so much has changed now that she is more coordinated and independent. In many ways, nursing is a lot more fun, but there are also new challenges.
First, the good stuff. Nursing an older baby is really fun! Eleanor knows how to latch herself, even using her hands to help with placement. It’s really cute to see. Sometimes she’ll be nursing, then will break off to babble at me, and then she will gently pinch my skin between her finger and thumb and expertly put my nipple back in her mouth. A few times now she has latched herself while I was sleeping without me even needing to wake up. Earlier this week I woke up because I started to feel a let-down, and as I gradually awoke thinking “Hm, why are my boobs leaking?” I noticed I could feel sucking, and sure enough my sweet girl was nursing away. I guess my boob was out from a previous nursing session and she went right ahead and helped herself! Latching has definitely come a long way. I can’t believe it was ever even an issue. Everyone told me that it would work itself out in time, but it was so difficult to believe in the moment. Latching went from a constant struggle to something that I don’t even need to help her with.
Nursing an older baby is also much less demanding. Eleanor only nurses about 4 times a day: before her morning nap, around noon, before her afternoon nap, and as she is going to sleep at bedtime. (I should mention though that this is one of those things that seems to vary a lot from baby to baby, and I have a friend who had a one year old that still wanted to nurse upwards of 10 times a day). She can go long periods without needing to nurse, and prefers to do it in the comfort and privacy of our house. It started to become more and more difficult to get her to nurse in public while we were out and about, and now it’s rare that I will even attempt it. She’s too easily distracted. There is too much going on for her to willingly sit with her face turned in toward me. Occasionally if she is really sleepy she will nurse while we’re out, but it’s mostly an at-home activity now.
Since breastfeeding isn’t something that happens around the clock any more, Eleanor gets really excited for our nursing sessions. When I sit down with her in the rocking chair or lay down with her in bed she knows what is coming and will squeal, wave her arms, and kick her legs in excitement. Even if she was in a crabby mood previously, knowing she is about to nurse makes her all smiley and giggly. It is so adorable.
And now for the bad thing…biting. E is a biter. There is no way around it. She has six little teeth and she loves to sink them in to everything. When I carry her around she bites my shoulder. My arms are covered in little bite bruises. She bites and rips at her toys quite viciously. Every now and again, she bites my nipples. She has broken the skin twice, and let me tell you, it hurts. It hurst and it takes a really long time to heal. I’ve read plenty of advice to help curb biting at the breast, but none of it has really helped. When she starts to bite I will unlatch her right away and make her wait a while to latch again. I yell “Ouch!” loudly, which some people say will startle a baby enough to get them to stop biting. A few times when she has bit really hard I’ve even put her down and walked out of the room for a few seconds, but I decided not to do that anymore because I don’t think she really understands what is going on. I’ve tried just about everything short of corporal punishment. No, I am not going to flick my 8 month old in the cheek or slap her hand no matter how hard and often she bites. I’ve come to the conclusion that she is just going to bite me occasionally. It’s something to be weathered, like so many other aspects of parenting. I really don’t think she is old enough yet to get the cause and effect of it all, and that’s one of the reasons why I’m not going to try anything even close to punishment. I think the best thing I can do at this point is to try to intercept the biting. I can usually tell when its coming and I can often stop it before it happens or at least lessen its severity. As she is biting I will pull her in closer to me and quickly break the latch, which usually does the trick.
Despite the biting, I still love breastfeeding more than I can even say. I’m still totally dedicated to keeping it up until she self-weans, and I’m looking forward to enjoying a long nursing relationship with my sweet girl. In fact, I feel so passionately about breastfeeding these days that I am considering becoming a lactation consultant when my kids head off to school.
Edite to add: I’m also still losing weight! Go breastfeeding! I’m down to 5 pounds less than my pre-pregnancy weight and I’m not doing anything even remotely close to dieting or exercising.
